In today’s political and social atmosphere, same-sex marriage has been reduced to a sound-bite morality issue. Gay marriage, much like abortion, has become little more than a political tool used by conservative politicians to shore-up their vote and keep their constituents from thinking about a faltering economy and foreign wars. But what happens if you re-frame the same-sex marriage debate? What happens if you dispel the morality argument and accept same-sex marriage as something that does and will continue to exist? Then same-sex marriage is free to engage itself, so to speak, with the wonderful world of the Wedding Industry. 

Kirista and Janie estimate that they’re spending $3000 on their wedding out of their own pocket – small change in a $72 billion per year industry, but enough money so that the brides had to take out a loan to cover it. When the couple adds what their parents are chipping in for the venue, rehearsal dinner and sundries, the final cost of the event will be at least double that. 

But of course, the economic impact of a wedding is much greater than money spent for caterers and florists and photographers. Consider the 35 out-of-town guests who will attend Kirista and Janie’s relatively small wedding. Or the clothes bought to wear to the event – Kirista’s mother shopped for six months to find just the right dress. Then there are the wedding gifts — a $19 billion industry itself.  

Now consider that 100,000 fewer couples were married in 2004 than the year before.  Although the population is steadily increasing, the marriage rate in the United States has been in decline since 1980. What is a $72-billion-a year industry to do if not welcome gay people into the fold? 

“I know that your wedding day is one of the most important days of your life. And looking beautiful, elegant and radiant plays a major part in how you feel walking down the aisle. So I want you to take a deep breath, relax and get ready to dream.” 

At the Emerald City Bridal Show in Eugene, Oregon, the dream of marriage is exactly what they’re selling. Hundreds of vendors pack into two huge exhibit halls at the county fairgrounds, coaxing customers with free samples, brochures and live music. Along with the usual array of photographers, caterers, and formal wear retailers, there are companies selling honeymoons, financial planning, and even plastic surgery.

Janie and Kirista have stopped at the Bridal Show to drop off payment to their photographer. But while they’re there, they get caught up in a crowd of brides, grooms, mothers and grandmothers gathered to watch the fashion show on the main stage. Techno music pumps over the speakers, and heterosexual marriage skits play out on the catwalk. In one such skit, five tuxedoed men with fake guns and dark glasses wrangle for the affection of a beautiful femme fatale bride. In another more traditional skit, the bridesmaids come in one by one to model their dresses for the crowd. Then a couple in a traditional tux and immaculate wedding dress enact a walk down the aisle.  Kirista and Janie take one look at the guy in the tux and start to laugh. He’s one of the regulars at the local gay bar. 

At the Emerald City Bridal Fair everything is marketed towards opposite-sex couples, with not a single image of a gay couple displayed. The wedding industry has been slow to break with the tradition it was built upon. Although hundreds of small companies have popped up in recent years catering specifically to same-sex weddings, finding an already-established business that has made the leap and publicly gone after the gay wedding market is rare – but not unheard of. The high-end jeweler, Cartier, has started to advertise wedding rings in gay publications, and one of the largest wedding sites on the web, theknot.com, has partnered with planetout.com, the largest gay site on the web, to shill its wares. 

Although none of the vendors at the Emerald City Bridal Fair are targeting gay couples, few if any would refuse the money from a gay wedding.  

“I don’t think we have a problem with gay marriage because we’re getting paid no matter what,” says a videographer at the fair.  

A couple selling honeymoon cruises says the travel industry has already felt a boom by advertising specifically to gay people. “Cruising over-all is very open to it. There are a lot of gay-only cruises.” 

A woman representing a wedding venue says, “Well of course there’d be an economic boost. I mean their dollar is the same as anyone else’s dollar.”